Resolving relationship difficulties with cbt


resolving relationship difficulties with cbt

Cognitive behavioral therapy can help your relationship in many ways—even Mindfulness-based CBT can address both of these issues;. Home» Relationships & Communication» 21 Couples Therapy .. who want to make changes or solve some difficult relationship problems. Resolving relationship difficulties with CBT: a self-help guide for couples. Front Cover · Dr Sadhana Damani, Larissa Clay. Blue Stallion Publications,

Other spouses feel that their partners are too withdrawn or do not share or open up enough. Finally, distressed spouses often avoid talking about problems in their relationships because they end up arguing and fighting with each other.

These communication problems often result in spouses feeling bad about themselves, their partners, and their relationships. A second problem frequently associated with marital distress is unrealistic expectations that spouses may hold about marriage or about each other.

resolving relationship difficulties with cbt

For example, spouses may believe that their partners should know what they are thinking and feeling without asking. In addition, distressed spouses are likely to have negative explanations for their partners' behavior.

For example, distressed spouses are likely to blame their partners for anything bad that occurs in the relationship. A third problem frequently associated with marital distress is lack of intimacy or loving feelings between spouses. Although the strong emotions associated with courtship naturally decline over time in most relationships, many spouses become upset when they observe such a decline.

They may perceive this natural decline as a loss of loving feelings, which is then often associated with a decrease in demonstrations of affection and decreased sexual activities.

resolving relationship difficulties with cbt

Other difficulties reported by distressed couples include specific problem topics, such as money management, jealousy, conflicts over values, and problems with in-laws. Other spouses become distressed when confronted with negative life events, such as the death of a family member or a serious illness.

Still other couples become distressed because of changes or advancements in one person's life that leave the partner feeling excluded.

Resolving Relationship Difficulties with CBT : Sadhana Damani :

Employment success and making new friendships are common examples of this. What Are the Consequences of Marital Distress? Evidence indicates that individuals who have problems in their marriages are more likely to have a variety of psychological problems, including depression and alcoholism. Compared to individuals who are married and getting along with their spouses, both men and women who are in unhappy marriages are much more likely to be clinically depressed.

Distressed spouses are also more susceptible to physical health problems. Another problem reported by spouses who are having marital problems is violence within the relationship. Almost one third of all married couples will experience violence at some time in their marriage, with distressed spouses being at greater risk.

3 Tips For Overcoming Trust Issues In Relationships - Dawn Wiggins Therapy

Marital violence can have a major impact on the relationship and on the psychological, as well as the physical, well-being of each spouse. Finally, behavioral problems in children are more common in families in which the parents are unhappily married. A number of studies have found that children who are exposed to marital distress, particularly to violence in the home, are at greater risk for their own emotional problems. Behavioral Treatment By the time they consider therapy, many couples also have considered the option of divorce.

resolving relationship difficulties with cbt

Therapy can help to answer questions of whether or not the relationship can provide what each spouse needs for a satisfying marriage. Although there are a number of treatment programs for unhappily married couples, the most widely researched form of treatment for marital distress is behavioral marital therapy.

There are several general goals of this approach to marital therapy. First, spouses are taught how to identify and increase the number of caring behaviors they do for one another.

Second, they are taught specific communication skills in order to improve the quality of their communication.

resolving relationship difficulties with cbt

Improving communication often produces greater emotional closeness and intimacy in the marriage. Instead, recognize that even if one of these motivations is partly to blame, there are probably other factors at play that are easier to discuss and work on. Finally, what's usually most effective… is to simply ask your partner.


If your spouse is having a difficult time or you often find yourself getting into arguments, consider that it takes two to tango, and that you are rarely entirely at fault. The reverse applies if you tend to err on the side of blaming your partner for everything: Identify your role in the problem, and take steps to work with each other to solve it. Thinking of people or situations in black and white terms. When you recognize this thought appearing in your mind, immediately take note of times when your partner does exhibit the positive behavior your mind is telling you she never does.

Like with most thought distortions, objectively considering the evidence can help you loosen up around unhelpful ways of thinking about things. Assigning a one-word descriptor to the entirety of a person. The solution for this kind of cognitive distortion is the same as with all-or-nothing thinking. Look for instances when your partner is exhibiting characteristics inconsistent with the label. Rather than believing this thought whole-heartedly, remember times she did or said things that were sensitive and caring.

You can continue to be on the lookout for sensitive behavior. Focusing on negatives while framing positives as unimportant. Instead, change your perspective by putting more emphasis on the positive behavior your partner is engaging in.