6 Tips To Rebuild Love After An Emotional Affair | HuffPost Life
Why is it hard to end a relationship that has become an emotional affair? Here is some insight into what the unfaithful spouse is probably thinking. An emotional affair can hurt a relationship just like a physical one. on Someone Else; Affair Recovery: 5 Steps to Repairing Your Relationship. Relationship repair requires disconnecting online emotional connections. can be an important step in addressing Internet infidelity, because.
First and foremost, an emotional affair is characterized by an intimate connection with someone who isn't your partner but the person takes on many of the functions of a significant other.
For instance, you might spend a lot of time with him or her, find yourself confiding in them; and you look to them for solace and support. It's key to acknowledge that in order for a relationship to qualify as an emotional affair, it usually involves a deep connection that is more than a friendship and has sexual chemistry.
Healing From An Emotional Affair: Why It Isn’t Your Fault & What To Do Next | avesisland.info
Most emotional affairs involve secrecy from your partner. For instance, if you find yourself not being completely honest about how much time you spend with this person, and the closeness of your bond, you are probably entangled in an emotional affair.
Many people embroiled in emotional affairs attest to the obsessive quality about them. For instance, they might find themselves having frequent sexual fantasies about him or her; or, waking up in the morning thinking about the person.
Another red flag of an emotional affair is frequent text messaging or sharing private details about your intimate life with your partner with the other person. At some point, your actual partner may seem dull or compare unfavorably to the other person and you might run the risk of seeing your partner in a negative light, or becoming easily frustrated with them.
If your relationship with your partner isn't a priority, you might find yourself slipping into the trap of seeking solace and intimacy with another person.
How to heal from a spouse’s emotional infidelity
For instance, Caitlin felt unhappy and disillusioned with her marriage and had formed a close relationship with Kyle, a male co-worker. They often ate lunch together and she kept this relationship a secret from her husband Tyler.
At times, she would confide in Kyle and fantasize about having sex with him. I feel guilty about my closeness to Kyle but don't want to tell Tyler about our relationship because he's jealous and possessive. She soon realized that keeping vital information secret from Tyler wasn't a way to build trust and intimacy with him and that keeping secrets was a way of self-sabotaging because she loves Tyler and wants to stay married.
Clearly, her emotional affair with Kyle was driving a wedge between Caitlin and her husband. A frequent path to an affair comes from sharing negative details about your marriage with the other person, seeking to get your emotional needs met outside of the marriage. Could it be our colorizations of those relationships?
No one wants to be seen as an infidel, nor do most people just set out to cheat. The solution then is viewing inappropriate relationships in such a way that makes it okay with us.
We do this by determining in our mind what constitutes infidelity or an affair. If you believe that person understands you in ways no one has before, then releasing the affair will prove very difficult. Letting go can be difficult if pride and ego are involved.
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At that point, rationale has little to do with things. Letting go of an emotional affair is more than possible, but the only currency you can use to buy your freedom is your pride and ego.
You have to first admit that you do in fact need to let it go. After all, this is a significant component of love: Not just merely alive, but feel as though their life has meaning again, and that their mundane existence has been transformed by this new-found love and understanding.
Feeling responsible for the Other Person: If the other person has experienced loss as a result of the emotional affair, such as the loss of a job or the loss of a marriage, the unfaithful spouse may feel a responsibility for the damage done and be conflicted about letting go of the relationship.
Be prepared that persistent thoughts in the form of worry and anxiety will likely show up for the person who was cheated on and that thoughts of insecurity and boredom will likely show up again for the transgressor.
Thought in the form of memories and emotions is the primary factor that prevents couples from re-establishing trust. However, it is possible to trust again.
6 Tips To Rebuild Love After An Emotional Affair
The key in re-establishing trust is when couples understand that they do not have to act on or even believe every thought that enters their mind. In the case of Mary and John, Mary made a conscious choice to forgive John and reports that they are doing very well now.
I recommend learning more about thought-based healing methodologies like the ones listed below. Start with these resources: