Deceit Quotes ( quotes)
Lies and secrets damage us and our relationships. These are the costs of deception that partners rarely consider. Intimacy is based on trust and authenticity — the ability to be vulnerable or . It can shatter the image we have of our partner, as well as our confidence in ourselves and even reality itself. What I'm talking about is kind of like emotional lying – it's subtler and therefore They also change based on the stage we're at in a relationship because each stage . This might trigger a feeling of deception and a lack of trust. crisis” they often seek to buffer their self-image by casting an opposite role. Your whole relationship is built on lies, but that isn't such a bad thing. with the idealized image that he projected during those first few months.
- Lying: A Relationship Deal Breaker
- Love and honesty: what we hide and why we lie
In the book Sex and Love in Intimate RelationshipsI cited extensive research on the subject of infidelity and posed the following: Deception may be the most damaging aspect of infidelity. Deception and lies shatter the reality of others, eroding their belief in the veracity of their perceptions and subjective experience.
As kids, we are taught that it is wrong to lie; yet as we get older, the lines tend to become increasingly blurred. This is especially the case when we are faced with the challenging conditions that come with intimate relationships. When this happens, jealousy, possessiveness insecurity and distrust can cause us to warp and misuse our relationships. An example of this might be a woman whose boyfriend gets so jealous that he forbids her to be alone with other men. Another example may be a man whose partner feels so insecure that she demands to be constantly reassured of his love and attraction to her.
This type of restrictive situation can become a hotbed for dishonesty. The woman may lie about time alone she spent with a male friend or co-worker, or the man may lie about an attraction he is starting to feel for another woman. When we treat our partners with respect and honesty, we are true not only to them but to ourselves. We can make decisions about our lives and our actions without compromising our integrity or acting on a sense of guilt or obligation.
When we restrict our partners, we can compromise their sense of vitality, and we inadvertently set the stage for deception.
Good relationships are built on lies & deceit - mainetoday
The more open we are with each other, the cleaner and more resilient our relationships become. Conversely, the more comfortable we become with keeping secrets, the more likely we become to tell bigger and bigger lies. When an affair occurs, denial is an act of deception that works to preserve the fantasy that everything is okay.
Admitting that something is not okay or that you are looking for something outside the relationship is information that your partner deserves to know. Emotions sprung from deception like suspicion and anger can tear a relationship apart, but more importantly they can truly hurt another person by shattering their sense of truth. How much are you willing to put up with and how much time are you willing to spend with a liar? The key ingredient in any relationship is trust, especially as we grow older.
Coupled with respect and love, trust gives you a strong basis as a couple.
While trust is a bond, it is also a tenuous one, easily broken, if one of the partners constantly lies. When we talk about lying, we're not including innocent white lies as in, "Did you close the outside lights?
It no longer is an active part of being a couple. That breaks the strong bond of partnership. Lies about fidelity and money are the two most common ones that affect couples.
Good relationships are built on lies & deceit
They make it almost impossible to have real trust ever again in a relationship. If your partner has cheated or if you feel that he or she will cheat again you have a trust issue.7 Red flags in a Relationship - Secrecy, Lies, Deception and More!
In addition to lying to you, he or she is making you constantly wait for "the other shoe to drop. Staying together is not an option for you. Life is too stressful. I absolutely cannot trust him. Once I caught him in a lie that changed everything. I can't take him back no matter how charming he seems to be right now.
A fifty-something woman confided to me about what her new husband had done that constituted a complete marital trust breaker. In the glow and trust of a new marriage she had put his name on her checking account. A week after coming home from her honeymoon she had gone to cash a check for two hundred dollars only to be told there were insufficient funds in her account.
Her new husband it seemed had used her money to pay off his heavy debts he had accumulated with his first wife, debts this wife knew nothing about! He had told her that he was debt-free when they were dating.