Menopause & Relationships - Dr Louise Newson ¦ Menopause Doctor
By the time I turned 50, menopause was in full swing and took a toll on our marriage during the first year. No one warned me that the "change of. Having menopausal symptoms can affect women in so many ways and symptoms can often be very detrimental to relationships. I have consulted with numerous. Others perceives the integral role of sexual relationships in their marital satisfaction and thus find strategies to adapt themselves to their modified bodies such as.
Trustworthiness In this study, a special attention was paid to the issue of trustworthiness as discussed by Lincoln and Guba. As for the first factor, credibility, the subjects were selected from a wide range of gender, work experience, and menopause status to gain access to multiple experiences. The analysis and discussion of the emerging findings was conducted in the presence of all members of the research team.
To increase the dependability of results, an interview guide was used and a single researcher conducted all inter views. It is the reader who decides the transferability of findings to other settings, but authors are required to provide sufficient documents regarding the transferability of their results. Reasons for sexual disharmonies 1 Ageing and health related-problems 1 The effect of menopausal symptoms and health problems on sexual function Menopausal symptoms such as lessened sexual desire and vaginal dryness as well as health problems such as vaginal fistula or health problems of the spouse such as diabetics, hypertension and heart dieses or side effects of drugs taken for diseases caused sexual disharmony.
I ask her how many times she has sex with her husband. I don't ever want to, unless he comes and forces me into itmy vagina is too dry and sensitive. In the experience of informants, some menopausal women were reluctant to get naked in front of their husband because they had a negative image of their body. A very small number of menopausal women tried to imitate pornographic movies and satellite program to satisfy their husband, but they deeply regretted doing so as such films were against their culture and religious values.
Oftentimes, women refer to cosmetic skin clinic, cosmetic clinic surgery and health providers. This woman could not meet her husband's sexual needs and thus followed the teachings of pornographic movies to satisfy their husband Some men expect their wife to act flirtatiously like young couples, or to imitate acts shown in satellite programs, but women usually refuse to do so and thus inflict great pain on their husband.
These women blamed satellite programs for their husband's demands. As a result, he often asked her to do hair coloring or wear dress like them [women in satellite programs].
Midwife, 58 years old, 3 years of work experience 3 Negative effects of prior marital dissatisfaction on sexual satisfaction The quality of pervious marital and sexual relationship has a significant effect on current sexual relationship. Women, who suffered from unfulfilled emotional and sexual needs of their husbands or their husband remarried in past, attempt to revenge their husband by avoiding sexual relationship when they are old and weak.
Seeing young couples with close emotional bonds around or on TV recall their unfulfilled wishes, which arouse angry anger and frustration. When he was young, he wouldn't have sex with me for even six months or a year.
My pride did not let me express that I had sexual needs. According to a GP year informant with 5 years of work experience, men tend to satisfy their sexual desires no matter have mad they are at their wife, but it is not the case for women. For instance, when arguing with their in-laws or being scolded by their husband, women cannot perform well sex-wise.
Informants stated that, some menopausal women were reluctant to sleep with their husband because they had a negative image of their body, thinking that the shape of their body and appearance was important to their husbands. However, in the experience of informants, what was of utmost importance to men was the quality of sexual relationship not the shape of their partner's body and appearance.
Informants cited many stories about men who have sexual satisfaction despite the obesity and agley of their wife. These women don't know that what matters is the quality of sex.
Menopause and Relationships (Fact Sheet)
I have an exceptionally pretty and handsome coworker in spite of her age; yet her husband went and took a temporary bride who was so fat, short and ugly. On the verge of menopause, a year-old women are keener on beauty tips and treating their sexual problems so that they can compete with younger women, but postmenopausal women stop to follow these strategies because there are less likely to do act of betrayal for an old men. Stereotyped beliefs have a lifelong effect on their perception of sexual relationships.
These caused menopausal women are shamed to raise or speaking wrappers for sexual needs with their husband. Lack of training about how to fulfill the sexual needs of their husband is another reason underlying the inability of menopausal women to fulfill the sexual desires of their partner.
This such dissimilar behavior between wife and spouse were attributed to different up bring by parent. According to informants, some menopausal women said they missed sex because they were overwhelmed by responsibilities such as taking care of grandchildren, purchasing the dowry of their daughter and so forth. Moreover, menopausal woman's concerns about separation and divorce of their children inhibited them from pondering on sexual issues.
Do you take good care of him? My son got divorced and I have to take care of my two grandchildren. Strategy to alleviate sexual disharmonies 1 Adaptive strategy 1 Change in roles and values Some of these women who believe that menopause is the same as ageing adopt an adoptive strategy and change their values and roles.
It changes their role from that of a pretty and sexy wife to a devoted mother and a good chef assuming that they are unable to compete with young girls.
Participants related stories about menopausal women who pretended to reach orgasm. I say 'Yes, yes, yes.
The Menopause is Affecting our Sex Life – Help & Advice | Relate
One informant related the story of an old man who anonymously called to talk with a midwife, saying that he was trying to suppress his sexual instincts through gardening. I even know a gentleman who said he wanted to talk with the midwife on the phone.
I do gardening to make myself busy ever since I retired from my job. I try to gradually kill my sexual instincts. My wife is so frigid; she has no sexual desires and won't ask for it if I don't initiate it even for a month. It was mainly due to the fact that Islamic rules urged Muslim women to fulfill the sexual needs of their husband. In fact, they referred to health providers only when other treatment methods suggested by apothecaries proved ineffective. She said that she would not allow this and would always fight over it, so he went and took a lady friend to do this.
I do not lose my temper right then and there, but I pretend to be in a bad mood the day before so he won't ask me for sex that night, cause my vagina burns so much when he does it. I just can't bear sex anymore.
Some women adopt an adaptive strategy by resorting to techniques such as faking orgasm or throwing a fit of temper, others are in an attempt to improve the situation and seek help from peers or friends, traditional medicine practitioners, charmwriters and healthcare providers.
Men seek a different strategy to manage sexual disharmony like remarriage or suppressing sexual instincts.
However, the results should be interpreted with caution for we only interviewed healthcare providers, and they may have failed to mention some other strategies. Our study identified a number of reasons for sexual disharmony such as effects of menopausal symptom and health problem on disharmony, negative body image, big age gap in the marriage, being unaware of sexual expectations of one's partner, stereotyped beliefs regarding menopause and sexuality, prior marital dissatisfaction on sexual satisfaction.
According to Statistics Canada, divorce among those 55 and over, has been steadily growing and is expected to increase as our population continues to age. We do know, however, that any time significant change—be it career, family, emotional or physical—is happening for one person, there is a direct impact for their partner. Menopause and perimenopause are no exception.
These are life phases women can successfully navigate with loving support from their family, friends, health care providers and community. Here are a few recommendations to help you help your husbands and loved ones navigate the menopausal years with you: Sort out fact from fiction: Menopause makes you crazy…or sick.
Menopause can be reversed. The truth is hormone levels begin to change as early as That means perimenopause can last up to 15 years before menopause—the one-year anniversary of your last period. The average age of menopause is You may notice that your vulva or vagina has become red and sore. None of these changes are conducive to a healthy, active sex life!
On top of this, the overwhelming fatigue that many women experience, the loss of confidence, hot flushes and memory problems that can also occur really can have a negative effect on their relationships.
This all sounds really depressing but it is so important to know that there are many treatments available to help with these symptoms.
Talking about the menopause and knowing you are not alone. There are many different types and doses of HRT available so it important to find one that suits you and is associated with low risks.
This is usually given as a gel and taking it can improve libido in many women.